Today has been a whirlwind for me. My emotions are all over the place and I really don't know how to deal with all of it. So I am going to write. Maybe not every night, or maybe multiple times. I don't know. Writing has always been very cathartic for me so I am going to continue doing this, despite the fact that she's gone. My fingers just hurt typing that. It's still so surreal. I can't go 2 minutes without thinking about her. Or crying. Or clutching my head in pain and confusion and disbelief. Some people may criticize me for displaying my pain in a public arena but I don't care. Like I said, it's cathartic.
But that's not what this post is about today. This post is to thank everyone for your thoughts and prayers and condolences. It may not seem like a lot but Dan and I have read every single message sent to us. We may not respond, but believe me, we have noticed. You can look at your stats on page views on blogger and it had 13,000 hits last night. Crazy. Thank you for all of your comments on here, on Facebook, via text, on the radio (thanks Dave, we were listening and it was beautiful) and even on babycenter.com (Here's a link - http://community.babycenter.com/post/a29408939/in_loving_memory_of_naya-?cpg=15&pd=-1) Like I said, it may not seem like a lot but we are reading it. And appreciate it. It warms my heart to know that Naya has touched so many people in her short little life. She had caused people to rethink their lives and hold their families and friends closer. She has caused people to come together in love rather than hate. That's more than most people accomplish in a lifetime. If her story helps even one person prevent this from happening to their baby, then it was worth sharing it. It may not cure my heartache but it helps. Naya has taught me patience and that I have a choice in life. I can choose to be sad and depressed (which I am, don't get me wrong. This is going to be a loongggg healing process) but I can also choose to go on and never take life for granted. To kiss my husband and son as much as I can and tell them how much I love them. To be thankful for the wonderful people there are in this world despite all of the hardships we face. It may not seem like it but we are going to get through this. For Naya.
Thank you. We love you all.